Pearls and Dreams
So ... Saturday, I let someone get to me. I worked harder than what my body had to give. It took me 2 days to uncurl my flared body from the position it went into when I finally stopped. I'm still paying the price. It's Wednesday and I still haven't loosened up enough to feel like I'm going to be OK by Saturday. When that happens ... the cycle would be endless.
So, my concern is mounting through the week and I'm praying.
"God, you know what I want to do! You know how much my hands want to be in the middle of this, you know how much it hurts when the looks come to tell me I'm not enough ... I HAVE TO DO THIS GOD!"
So, I argue with God, all day, every day. I HAVE TO DO THIS! I've worked too hard, prayed to hard, cried too hard and trusted Him too hard to not be a part of this now!!!! I cannot just sit back and watch ... what am I supposed to do sit still while my house is being built by others?
I've heard that before.
Still ... still? God? You want me to SIT STILL? How in the world can I sit still? My house needs to be built, what will people think? What will they think of my testimony about YOU if I just sit still?
So tonight ... we sing a new song ... Called STILL
Based on Psalm 46:10
If I could have ... I'd have been on my knees.
The scripture I memorized for a ribbon as a child rang loud in my heart
Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!
Do I need to do anything for God's name to be exalted? Do I have to be the one to swing the hammer or sweep the mud?
Be still ... and know that HE is God.
So, I looked it up, in context ...
Verses 6 through 10
6 The nations raged, the kingdoms were moved; He uttered His voice, the earth melted. 7 The Lord of hosts is with us; The God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah 8 Come, behold the works of the Lord, Who has made desolations in the earth. 9 He makes wars cease to the end of the earth; He breaks the bow and cuts the spear in two; He burns the chariot in the fire. 10 Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth! 11 The Lord of hosts is with us; The God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah
I sat back and realized ... I've talked repeatidly about how he calmed the war zone of my household. How He ended the war in our family ...and brought PEACE and calm.
I constantly am in awe at the family that I now call mine. That God gave me inspite of the war that once existed.
This is the same God ... be still and know ... I can sit back and watch him build my house ... and know that he is God. That doesn't mean that I can't do anything. But when it's time to sit, and let my body rest ... I can sit ...and rest and know that HE IS God ..and in HIM I take refuge.
Not in what other's think of me, not in what I can do or can't do ... not in whatever I am afraid that people will think of God if I don't do ...
It's not my job to do anything but
To be still and know that HE is God and he WILL be exalted.